Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Can You Hear Me Now?

I had the funniest experience yesterday. OK, this story starts with my husband getting an eye lift. It's not that he's vain....he has (had) droopy eyelid syndrome. Who knew that was so common? Anyway, he was healing fine until he started pulling the stitches out. He said they bothered him. I would have kept my fingers from my eyelids if it was the last thing I did (I am a very good patient) but my husband is more bold. And so, as he pulled out the stitches, surprise, surprise, his eye split open. With a split open eye he couldn't roll over at night to sleep on his stomach which meant that he snored on his back like a polar bear during the long Arctic winter. Earplugs where my only solution. Night one was fine. I awoke in the morning with normal hearing and a decent night's sleep. Night two, however, was not so kind. I awoke with the hearing of a 90-year old woman or somebody with a BAD case of swimmer's ear. Couldn't hear a thing. What to do? I have had my ears irrigated by a nonspecialist before, but that led to a hole in my ear drum. So, I went to my local ENT. Fortunately, they had a cancellation so I was able to get in right away. My doctor, a cute, short little Middle Eastern man all dressed in black with a shock of white hair, checked my ears for what I knew was there, lots of wax.... In my right ear he dislodged the ear wax with the longest pair of tweezers I'd ever seen. For my left ear he tells me I have two options. One, use over-the-counter ear wax softener over and over. I had tried that all weekend.....didn't work. Option two, which he recommended, was to have my ear vacuumed. Say what? Vacuumed... and with the tiniest little vacuum you have ever imagined. And then, moments later warns me, "Don't move," as I held onto the chair while he stuck this longgggg and very thin silver tube into my hear, turned on the motor and literally vacuumed out the wax that was up against my eardrum. Yes, it was very NOISY! And all I could think about was another hole in my eardrum so I sat like a statue. And...relief! I CAN hear you now. Vacuuming your ear....what a funny thing!

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